PeopleMatter

The Top Six Causes of Career Break-ups

Relationships are great — when they work. If you find that person you just ‘fit’ with, everything clicks. The sun shines, bees buzz and every song on the radio is about love. But what happens when things turn sour? Do you recognize the signs? Can you prevent the ugly end of something beautiful?

Personal and professional relationships have more in common than you'd think; they both take work, commitment and similar “exit strategies.” If a few team members have given you the old, “Let's just be friends” or “It's not you, it's me” take Smiley's Love-Doctor advice to prevent your next horrible heartache (or hiring headache).

You Thought You Knew Me

From the moment you met, you knew ‘Jane’ was the one. You didn’t ask about her interests, dreams or past relationships; it didn’t matter, she was perfect. She laughed at all your jokes and even had your favorite team’s jersey. But after a couple weeks, things went wrong. She partied all night, cancelled at the last minute and, even worse, you found out she didn’t even actually like sports. When she finally dumped you it was by text … and she kept your iPod.

Sound familiar? Maybe you hired an employee based on a good ‘gut instinct,’ only to find out they gave you a stomachache instead. Despite a poor attitude and showing up late, your turnover was high, and a ‘warm body’ was better than no body. So you kept them on the team … until the day they quit showing up.

Smiley Advice: Really get to know candidates … before you commit to them. Pre-screen candidates with electronic assessment tests and background checks. These screenings weed out subpar people automatically, so you can find ‘the one’ faster.

You Never Told Me How…

‘John’ was so charming. Everyone loved him. You’d been looking for someone for awhile, and when you started dating, everything he did was so cute. But, when you moved in together, you discovered some irritating habits. He never made the bed, he folded towels wrong, and he didn’t put the toilet seat down. And when you got upset — he’d complain, “You never said anything before,” or, “You never showed me how to….” Finally, he got fed up with the criticism and moved out.

People make the same mistake in the workplace by expecting team members to anticipate business needs. Not every employee will perform at the same skill level or possess the same strengths. John might not know how to work the cash register, but maybe no one ever taught him. Blaming him isn’t the way to develop a good relationship, and certainly doesn’t solve the problem.

Smiley Advice: Communicate how you feel and what you need. People want to be good at their jobs, but they need to know how. Provide clear expectations and goals upfront, as well as continued training and feedback, to help employees grow. An integrated learning management system helps define role requirements, hone skills and increase retention. So if you ‘can’t get no satisfaction,’ implement online training programs to increase overall satisfaction by 46 percent.

You Never Make Time For Me

‘Jill’ was terrific. You finally found someone who understood your crazy work schedule. But then she started getting all whiney about making enough time for ‘the two of you’ and how you ‘always called at the last minute’ to make plans. What were you supposed to do? Try to arrange your schedule for her convenience? Finally you told her, “You knew what my schedule was like when we started, and I can’t change it for you.” So she left.

In today’s hourly workforce, employees work multiple shifts — that change every week. It’s hard for employees to commit to plans outside of work when they have such little schedule predictability and foresight. So as difficult as it might be for you to plan the weekly schedule; it’s no walk in the park for your people either. If you expect Jill to show up when you call her in a panic 10 minutes before the lunch rush, you should probably give her personal schedule some consideration too.

Smiley Advice: Respect each others’ time. Implement an online scheduling system that can help you quickly and easily create schedules weeks — even months — in advance. Give employees more control and accessibility with mobile tools that let them view and trade schedules on-the-go. Work with your team and they’ll keep working for you.

You Don’t Appreciate What I Do

Your parents thought ‘Jack’ walked on water. He called them every week, he cooked, he cleaned … he even washed your car. They always reminded you how lucky you were, but aren’t boyfriends supposed to do those things? Why should you have to reward him for doing his job? Then, out of nowhere, he dumps you for not appreciating him. Who’s going to make dinner now?

A simple “thanks” can go a long way in work relationships too. Too often, managers are too busy to notice, or don’t take the time to communicate, good employee performance. You remember that employee you could always count on? The one who always helped out the new guy and made sure everything was spotless before the General Manager visited? If he doesn’t feel his extra effort is appreciated and valued, he’ll eventually leave to find an employer who does.

Smiley Advice: Show your people you appreciate them. The first step is to adopt a company-wide recognition and rewards program. Set realistic short-term objectives, and make the goals and qualifications clear. Find out what motivates your employees and provide targeted feedback to show them you care. Finally, make sure your managers know the power of a simple ‘thank you.’

You Won’t Talk About Yourself

When you get home, ‘Jenny’ always asks about your day. She wants to know about the game, your brother, what you think about the new curtains … talk, talk, talk. She keeps pushing you to share, and you just don’t see the point. She was all about being ‘in this together’ … until she left because you didn’t include her.

If your team members feel out-of-the-loop or that you don’t listen to their opinions, it can corrode your entire culture. Send regular updates, listen to suggestions and try to really connect with your people to prevent them from feeling disengaged and moving on.

Smiley Advice: Keep the lines of communication open. Today’s hourly workforce, especially Gen Y employees, values employers who cater to their on-the-go, always-connected lifestyles. Provide a mobile-social communication platform that opens consistent, real-time communication between managers and the front line. They’re the face of your brand; engage them so they feel like a part of your company, not just a ‘silent partner.’ It’s all about R-E-S-P-E-C-T.

You Couldn’t Define “Us”

You always got queasy when ‘James’ mentioned kids. He was totally looking for house with a picket fence, 2.5 kids, a minivan and a dog. Yikes. You liked him and things felt “right,” but who knows what next week will bring? What if he turned out like ‘Jack?’ Why should you worry so much about planning a future? So, when ‘James’ got down on one knee, you froze … and he left.

Your employees want to that there’s a future with your organization. The number one cause of turnover among hourly employees is a lack of career progression. These employees don’t necessarily see their ‘job’ as a ‘career’ due to high turnover, limited opportunities and low engagement levels in these industries. If you don’t give ‘James’ a clear path to manager, he may not hang around.

Smiley Advice: Make it clear where things are headed. Clearly define and communicate each role’s responsibilities, expectations and opportunities. If you aren’t planning to provide internal-growth opportunities any time soon, be honest about it. Explain why. Your employees will appreciate your upfront honesty instead of expecting something you don’t plan on giving.

Not Going to Write You a Love Song

Every sappy song out there makes ‘happily ever after’ sound so easy, but it’s just not true. If you want to retain your workforce relationships, you need to put in the same effort you would for your personal relationships … with your employees, it’s time to make some changes.

Because even though your employees may say, “It’s not you, it’s me…” — it’s something only you can fix.

Happy Loving,
The PeopleMatter Institute